Star Crossed LoVE

 The universe never ceased to amaze her no matter

 how long they have known each other!

Once again she was totally shocked and surprised 

at how she had been in an intimate relationship 

with the universe and never even saw it. 

Until now. 

All the planets have been working with her since day one. 

They were her family.

Her teachers.

Her companions.

and

Her Protectors. 

She was totally blessed with how much she had been given 

no matter what she was going through in this life time.

This was her proof and witness of God. 

The Higher Power that kept 

life going no matter what was happening.

When she realized all this, it totally put into perspective for her

everything that was happening to her in the here and now. 

And just what exactly was happening in the here and now?

She had finally reached the point in her existence that was 

going to level her up to what she came here to do.

All it took was for her to learn what true self love was

by standing up for her hearts' truest desire.

It wasn't about giving to others that which she hadn't even

 given herself.

It was not about abusing her body out of fear that 

a person would leave her for another.

And it definitely wasn't about allowing herself to be 

ridiculed for her belief in spirituality, the stars and the planets!

The one thing she learned in this life time 

of hers, was that God always came first and

 that no one was more important 

to her then God and her own self. 

Because without having and showing love to herself,

there really was no love to even share with anyone else! 

And that's what she finally came to the conclusion 

in all these years! 

That self love was;

 the boundaries she had set for herself.

The morals and principles that mattered to her.

The rules and limits that she abided by and allowed. 

And also the respect, honor and value that she gave to her own self on a daily basis. 

She learned all this with the help of her 

universal team whom never left her side no matter how bad things got! 

And for that she was forever grateful.

 

She happily shared with the universe her love always

 because that was the bond they shared since day one.

Let go to Surrender

It was Sunday night, 

Or Early Monday morning, since it was  midnight exactly,

however people wanted to look at it, she imagined..

However, that wasn't the main event in her mind. 

Her mind was a fog, all day long... 

But towards the evening, it managed to get more dense

instead of clearing up like she wished it would. 

She wondered if maybe she was putting her power 

out there. 

And when she reminisced the night from earlier, 

she realized real quick that indeed she had. 

She wondered why though. 

What was making her give over her power all the time to outside

energies?

and that's when it hit her. 

It was because she wasn't getting anywhere in her own life.

She wasn't doing anything that was producing any fruit.

She was sinking.

Deeper and deeper into the great abyss of nothingness.

Why wasn't the energies working with her?

What was the hold up?

She couldn't figure it out. 

She was doing all that she loved. 

She was making videos on the stars and planets. 

She was offering all that she knew about birth charts

and the readings of it to the collective... 

Yet nothing was catching on. 

Nothing was being rewarded financially to her. 

She was getting deeper and deeper into debt.

She couldn't buy food, gas, clothes, let alone pay for any rent 

or utilities. 

She was really falling head first into a bottom less pit!

She tried so hard to get jobs. 

But no one seemed to respond. 

When she went to them, they all turned her away. 

What was happening?

Why was she stuck in this twilight zone?

What was the universe trying to tell her? 

And why couldn't she hear it?

She was at her wits end... 

And she knew... It was almost over.

All of it...

There was not much more that could fall. 

Disappear..

or even Explode...

It was time...

Time to just let go. 

Let go of it all. 

And so she did that night... 

She laid down after 3 glasses of Pinot Grigio..

and she softly said to herself...

God be with me as I lay me down to sleep..

I pray, thee my lord, my soul to keep...

and then she passed out... 

BuRNinG CoaLs

 She awoke the next day excited to hear her favorite tarot reader.

The messages that always came through never ceased to amaze her!

And this morning was no different!

As she heard the words 'Lie and twin flame' spoken, 

immediately, she knew she was busted. 

The words 'twin flame' get tossed around in this life as an attachment

assistant... 

Yet she knew the real meaning behind the true twin flame connections.

She could read charts and so she knew when there was something

that had existed between two people several life times ago. 

And with him this was one of those many lifetimes. 

How many more would it take to really learn what they came 

here to learn? 

That was the million dollar question.

Well, for her, this reading about knowing 

where we lie, not only to others,

but to our own selves...

Got her really intrigued! 

It was almost like something inside her got nudged and then continuously

tugged at her soul until she allowed the truth to be told...

But so then where was her lie in the twin flame story?

 The only way to find out was through the events that always repeated.

and here she was anxious to let it all unfold

 in the recap of the whole story from her perspective

in order to find out. 

It all began when she decided to change her profile picture because the solstice 

was very much upon them. She always got her nudges to take actions from her intuition.

And this profile change was indeed one of those nudges. 

As the day progressed, she got a couple of people clicking 'like' on her

update, including her sister's ex. Which of course not only triggered 

her sister, but also triggered her own ex...

Her twin flame, 

who of course had been cast back into the evil underworld

where he kept trying to escape from over and over again.

He had been watching her ever so closely since day one

 and always managed to get himself Triggered!

She already knew he needed a lot of shadow work, just as she was doing her own...

 yet he had clearly

expressed to her many times before that he didn't want to do his. 

And that is exactly what lead the relationship they had to it's demise.

~Three Months Later...~

 There he was still following her ever so closely on social media,

 constantly getting himself triggered and then running up smear 

campaigns against her, when clearly all they were doing was adding on to his 

regrets. His disappointments. His fears. 

His shadow was growing faster then imaginable! 

He tried to escape them by pushing his mind and body so hard... 

He was running miles and miles daily... trying to out run his shadow... 

But little did he know... 

All he really had to do was stop and turn the other direction. 

Back To the light. 

And in that way, his shadow would not lead him. 

Instead it would be behind him.

And he wouldn't lose his power anymore because when he walked forward,

 the shadow would always be behind him. 

Peace, Love, Joy, and Freedom would all be his.  

But he chose to live in his shadows. 

And so there, he would only find and meet his demons and fears. 

Battling them daily... Yet never going anywhere except in circles, 

called Karma or The Matrix. 

So... 

After hearing the message from the tarot lady... 

She knew that she had a lie of her own to face. 

And that lie was one of mystery. 

Why? 

Because she knew that her twin flame was like this when she first met him.

She saw all of his pains and chains that he had tied himself all up in.

Yet she still chose to get with him. 

And this was the mysterious lie in her. 

Why did she do it? 

Was it pride? 

Pride that she was going to fix him or help him? meaning she was better?

That was a possibility. 

Who was she kidding, that was it exactly.

She had always thought she was better then everyone...

Until she met him and realized that she was no different then him.

They were twins. 

Twin Flames. 

Meaning they could either put their flames together and create 

a brighter flame to share with the world..

or they could burn each other when they allowed their own flames to burn themselves

and get way out of control.

 However, the only way that they could ever tame this type of flame

was going to be with the guidance and help of God... 

With God, the flames would not burn out of control and destroy their entire world.

But without God... 

There was no hope of that, because all there was without God's light was 

shadows. 

 

And that is why He was now in the underworld....

And still getting triggered daily by not just her, but everyone 

and everything that he would ever come upon in his life...

But all she could do was admit her own faults.

Her own self deceptions, prides, and lies...

And just continue to work on her own shadows

as they came up daily because she lost her own way

many times too.

 No one was perfect. 

She knew that much. 

And that's why she had compassion for all,

 including her Twin Flame

. 

 

 

 

The Attitude

Not being able to drink, made her want to drink. 

Not wanting to feel emotions. only made them come around more.

But then wanting to make money or get a job, 

only made it ten times harder to even land a job, 

let alone save any money from what she already had.

So what gives? She questioned.

Why did life always seem to work in a paradox?

What was the secret that everyone else seemed to 

have gotten ahold of in order to be doing so much better then her?

She sat and pondered this thought for a moment. 

She wanted to feel out the flow of what she was doing..

Because obviously there really wasn't any flow happening 

so she knew something had to be reviewed, revisited, and revised.

If she wanted to make money or land a job in the here and now,

She had to first examine why she wasn't landing the jobs she was applying for.

She began by  asking herself the basic easy to see reality questions

 like; 

Had she done her part and applied for the job?

The answer there was yes. 

Did she possess all the skills required for the job she applied to?

The answer there was also a yes. 

Then she questioned herself with... has she gone up to the actual job 

and showed assertion, interest, and confidence in her abilities to help the 

applied to company?

And the answer yet again was an indiddly diddly do yuppers! 

So then... what was the hold up she thought? 

Could it be???

The unseen?

The energetics? 

Perhaps it was.

But for now it wasn't helping. At least it didn't look like that from her 

stand point. From where she was standing she actually looked like 

she wasn't even trying. People were telling her to try harder. 

That perhaps she didn't even want to get a job. 

But that really wasn't the case. She was indeed trying really hard. 

However, the universe was trying just as hard along with her

to fulfill the energetics inside her. 

The energetics of LACK.

The more she focused on the struggle to find something that she didn't yet have...

Told the universe to give her more of what she didn't have. 

But why was that?

And that's when she realized that the universe could only match her

to the vibration she had in her. 

So if the vibration flowing in her was one of need, want, or hope... 

The universe matched her with those lacks there of.

And so...After finally coming to terms with this sudden revelation,

 she took a step back and reassessed her view and intention... 

She didn't need anything, she thought. 

She was totally happy and content in her now moment. 

She was blessed with all that she could ever want. 

She had her family, friends, and nature all around her.

She had a house, food, a car, and money in her pocket. 

She had her health and vitality and she had God with her. 

There was nothing else she needed. She was completely and 

totally blessed and grateful! 

And after going through the list of all that was around her 

in that now moment, she felt a huge joy lift up in her. 

The energy was so great that it flowed right out of her into 

everything she did the rest of that day. 

And as she finished writing her first blog entry for the next chapter 

of her life... 

She felt truly grateful for the wonderful gift as a writer

that God had bestowed upon her!