The Battle Within Ignited...

 With the Full Moon in Leo coming around the corner slowly

like a Lion strategically maneuvering it's prey, 

She too was trying to slow down the emotional upheavals

that kept exploding at her on a daily basis!

As she stepped back into the shadows though, so as to not be 

blinded by the sparks and blazing fires of all the flaming arrows

thrown... 

She saw that perhaps these battles were meant to happen. 

In order for all the emotional cellular memory pains to be 

activated within her... something had to trigger them!

And she knew, that most of her emotional pains did indeed

come from her old family lineage!

But... as they were all being hit one by one, flaming arrows

all burning away at her core... what was she to do?

Was she to follow the commands of those who were 

throwing the arrows? 

Should she leave?

Should she run?

Should she hide?

Or should she fight back?

As she contemplated each one of these fearful coping 

mechanisms, she realized that this time around, she wasn't going

to give away her power by turning to her fear mechanisms. 

This time, she was going to just sit back into acceptance of 

what was happening before her, to her, and in her. 

No, it didn't feel good. 

Knowing that people didn't approve of who she was.

It didn't feel good that everyone saw her as a failure because she 

didn't live as they wanted her to.

It didn't feel good not being seen for all the great energy 

she was pouring into them and their lives, but instead being made

felt as though she was a burden on them. 

But she accepted it. 

She allowed this not so good feeling to run through her. 

And she welcomed it... 

And then she examined it as it came up one by one. 

She realized as they came up though as... False beliefs... 

A false belief that family was supposed to be accepting and loving. 

That family was supposed to be the ones who knew everything.

She accepted that the idea she created as a child in her mind

that family was the one who would tell her when she was right

or when she was wrong turned out to be a very unreal truth! 

It was all just false beliefs! 

She didn't have to maintain any connection to them at all. 

No one was going to tell her that she was of bad character. 

The only person she had to ever be eye to eye with was God. 

And she realized that sometimes, even family would end up

falling away out of one's life because they just couldn't see eye to eye.

And that was actually okay.

No harm no foul. 

It was just what it was. 

A parting of energies.

A moving on. 

An ascension!

Attraction CoNTRaPtioN

 Today was a day of easy flowing. 

She sat outside and meditated first thing in the morning

 with her music and coffee

. 

Then she did her yoga not long after that. 

Later, she made two videos in the afternoon. 

Yet figured she'd edit them later the next day since 

she had planned to do her door dash right around peak time!

And that she did. 

And now, here she was at the end of her day feeling 

very accomplished and very content. 

She was writing in her blog and that's pretty much 

all she really needed in this life. 

well... That and a partner for those extra snippets of 

available times for fun and adventures to far away unknown places!

Yes... That was all that was missing from her life as of right now. 

But she didn't let it get the best of her. 

Instead she remembered that in order to attract the right energy,

she had to first be the energy she was looking to attract. 

And so... She configured for herself exactly that energy which 

she had wanted to attract...

And just how would she do it?

How would she create the feeling of all the joys that she

wanted to experience together with a matching partner? 

 And that's when the answer hit her...

Smack dab between her eyes!

She was going to call upon God and ask him to go with her

 on all of the wonderful journey's she wanted to explore

in the here and now!

And so she did just that. 

And she knew... 

She was never alone. 

And that when she went with God anywhere... 

She always knew she was safe. 

She was taken care of.

She was provided for.

And that everything she did, was also respected and honored. 

With God by her side, she knew she was free to be who she was created to be. 

And that made every journey she took, the best one ever! 

This is where her true joy radiated from!

And this is where God would be able to match her with a true match!

Because God was the creator of the law of attraction,

And She knew that it always worked. 

For the good or for the bad. 

And this time, she wanted it 

to be

 for the good. 

Live And Let Live

 It was Friday... 

The end of a week.

And the end of it all for her.

Not her entire life.

But just the parts of it that she used to think were right.

The parts that circled. 

Repeated.

Over and over again... 

Same karmic scenarios, only with different people each time.

It was hard for her not to see it anymore.

Every where she turned. 

Every where she went.

There they were. 

All the disrespectful things she had allowed herself to endure.

In the morning, facebook had reminded her of a time when she 

allowed a pimply, vitamin popping, over exercising freak,

 hemorrhoid cream desperate,

  kid to tell her where she was living wrong. 

How the foods she was eating, the exercises she was doing, 

the things she believed in, were all so wrong compared to his 

ideas of wellness and discipline! 

And then tonight... When she had come home from a long day 

of work... She came upon her next hurdle, her ex... 

She was really starting to see how the universe was trying 

so hard to open her eyes for her.

But in the end it was really up to her to open them.

And with this last one she finally decided that she was going to 

not only open them, but also to keep them open.

From this day forward. 

It was finally finished. 

All of it. 

She realized that she had been selling herself short for far too long!

She was an incredible woman.

She was so full of love. 

Loyalty... not only to herself but to anyone else that she would

LOVE.

And so today, after her final talk with what she had wanted to believe

was her twin flame... 

But she knew she was clearly so wrong to believe in such a fairytale nonsense

that was ever created on this earth to fool those who dared to play...

And of course, she should have known better,

since she knew she created the game in the first place. 

And really...

It's not just make believe... 

It was all a f*cking Nightmare!

In the end, 

she realized that life was better left alone to just live.

And that's exactly what she was going to do this time around.

Cuz there was always that. 

To Just

 Live 

and

 Let live...

Whoops! I did it again...

The song lyric said, 

 "Rewrite the story"...

And so today she would try. 

It was the day that Venus, the Planet of Love, 

was moving into Pisces, the Sign of Fairytales and Magic! 

She thought to herself, 

It couldn't have been a better match made in Heaven then 

what was already taking place in the here and now!

She was feeling her entire world being shifted into 

complete and total unknown territory! 

But she wasn't fighting it. 

She felt that it was just time. 

That this unknown territory was really not all that unknown.

She felt like it was something she herself had created already

in perhaps many lifetimes before. 

Only each time, she picked up something new to carry forth to 

the next phase of her existence. 

And so this day is where the new story began and the old one ended.

The old story that kept repeating.

The old story that she saw everyday as she drove past 

all the trees, buildings, and waters of this earth.

This old story always repeated... and she never could figure out why,

until now. 

She was never really aware of it, but her mind's eye 

had always been fixated on things that were in front of her. 

People who crossed her path.

Friends, family, co workers, kids, boyfriends... 

She couldn't put it together until now, 

that all of these outside people that she chose to focus on 

each and every single day...

had become her mind's eye candy.

She became addicted to the things they would 

say about her, or things they would do to her. 

She was even always focusing on how to help them all heal

and become better versions of themselves!

But little did she know... 

By looking outside of her every single day, 

she continued to repeat every day as if it was the day before. 

Until she realized that it was her own heart that needed 

to be seen.

To be heard.

To be healed... 

She continued to repeat each day, each moment, each situation,

exactly as she had done every other day of her life!

Until Today... 

Today, she chose to look in the mirror and accept what she saw in front of her.

Herself. 

Her true self.

Her true essence.

Her true beauty.

And there she began to truly live. 

One day at a time. 

Side Stepped

It was the the day after the unveiling of the secrets that had kept 

her going round and around in karmic circles that she found herself

in a void...

It was a day of a standstill where she really didn't know which 

way to go next. 

The wind wasn't blowing.

Nothing was nudging her into either direction...

She was just standing still right there between 

the knowing  and the unknown... 

She definitely wasn't going to get anywhere by just standing there

in between... 

She was going to have to move eventually. 

But which way would she go?

The unknown definitely seemed like the right way. 

And she knew that it would probably be the best option.

Especially after all that karmic repeating that always ended the same way.

But... 

then she gave thought to the fact that

At least she always knew how the old karmic ways ended. 

And it almost felt like there was a security in that. 

In the knowing of how it all would always end up.

There was also security in the knowing of the fact that she had learned 

all the characters that she would play in order to come out

looking like the hero. 

Or the victim...

Depending on the scoreboard that she was holding her standards

up against...

And this is exactly where she realized what she had done! 

She had built up in her mind a path for her own masculine energy to follow

in order to stay in a safe zone.

But this path was not the path of  Her Heart. 

This was the path of the fearful Ego that had come to life a long time ago!

Fear could never create what the heart could easily produce.

And so... 

There she was at the crossroad... 

Just standing still...

Contemplating... 

Did she want to forever continue doing all that she knew and 

had mastered in the years and years that she had already wasted?

Or was she going to give into the fear of the unknown and 

actually allow herself to start all over again just as she did 

when she was a little child. 

Only this time... 

She was prepared with the emotional security which 

she knew noting about when she was a child. 

The emotional security that she needed to acquire through 

experiences and hardships that she had already lived through.

She was now ready to face this unknown with a power and 

confidence that she realized she had built up in her life prior to 

this new choice and new direction.

The power of Self Love!

Suddenly, as she was standing there in the deep dark void, 

she saw a light begin to light up in front of her... 

She looked to see where it was coming from..

Perhaps it was a sign for her to know which way to go!

Which direction to choose!

She squinted her eyes to see where the light was shining from 

and no sooner then later she realized that the light was coming from

within her. 

Her own inner light had begun to shine within her as soon as she 

allowed her fears to be acknowledged by her heart! 

Her heart was able to comfort her fears into Love and 

this love became a light so bright that it began to shine out 

of her and onto the dark road in front of her. 

It lit up everything around her and she clearly knew 

right then and there exactly which way to go. 

Broken MiRRoR revelations

POP!!! 

There went the champagne cork!

The New Moon in Aquarius hadn't even landed yet, but there was 

already a great huge deal of secrets being exposed that had called to her 

for a celebration...

But only after a long hard brutal ending of course. 

Which seemed to be the case for her all her life, or so it always seemed to play out. 

Besides, what was a new beginning without a rather explosive dramatic

ending!

Right?!?!

And of course, there she was... 

Champagne in hand, 

Huge evil grin on her face... 

Just ready to shake that shit up!

Was she ready?

God yes she was!

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

It was January 19th 2023...

After living her life in a way that was never 

Real

True

Or 

Authentic

To who she was created to be... 

She was definitely ready to hand in the keys to her previous attempts

and begin again.

Back in March of 2022, she had asked for a revelation of the spell

that was cast upon her to be written out to her, so she could finally 

see it. 

But it never came to her until she finally reconnected to God 

once and for all!

And that would all happen 10 months later! 

Why so late you ask?

Because the seed had to be planted first..

The seed of intention.

So when she planted her seed of wanting an answer to become 

relevant about the truth of her life... 

God, the universe, and her angel team got straight to it!

They began to do the work of putting together and bringing forth the truth 

to her since she truly desired with all her heart to know this truth 

so she could change her direction for the highest good of all.

And that is exactly what had happened for her, 10 months later. 

There she sat with her mom, having a conversation..

well actually having several conversations.

Some good and some very brutal, but amongst all this 

release of energies, sprouted the truth!

The truth she needed to hear in order for her life to take a huge 

turn for the better!

She learned that night of the power of words. 

Words spoken that were of judgment and disgrace!

They were words that could and would cast a spell 

over anyone. Especially a young child. 

And this was the tone of her revelation. 

The fact that she had been keeping herself under a spell

of words spoken. 

Because she allowed herself to love people outside of her

more then she chose to love herself and believe in herself..

She had given away her power a long long time ago.

 She was never really true to herself.

She was never really real about who and what she truly believed in.

She had gotten so lost in everyone's idea's and expectations

 that she didn't even see it!

Everything was a mumbo jumbo of a mess that just seemed so real.

But she wasn't real... And so the equation was always off..

Way off!

Until NOW.

Star Crossed LoVE

 The universe never ceased to amaze her no matter

 how long they have known each other!

Once again she was totally shocked and surprised 

at how she had been in an intimate relationship 

with the universe and never even saw it. 

Until now. 

All the planets have been working with her since day one. 

They were her family.

Her teachers.

Her companions.

and

Her Protectors. 

She was totally blessed with how much she had been given 

no matter what she was going through in this life time.

This was her proof and witness of God. 

The Higher Power that kept 

life going no matter what was happening.

When she realized all this, it totally put into perspective for her

everything that was happening to her in the here and now. 

And just what exactly was happening in the here and now?

She had finally reached the point in her existence that was 

going to level her up to what she came here to do.

All it took was for her to learn what true self love was

by standing up for her hearts' truest desire.

It wasn't about giving to others that which she hadn't even

 given herself.

It was not about abusing her body out of fear that 

a person would leave her for another.

And it definitely wasn't about allowing herself to be 

ridiculed for her belief in spirituality, the stars and the planets!

The one thing she learned in this life time 

of hers, was that God always came first and

 that no one was more important 

to her then God and her own self. 

Because without having and showing love to herself,

there really was no love to even share with anyone else! 

And that's what she finally came to the conclusion 

in all these years! 

That self love was;

 the boundaries she had set for herself.

The morals and principles that mattered to her.

The rules and limits that she abided by and allowed. 

And also the respect, honor and value that she gave to her own self on a daily basis. 

She learned all this with the help of her 

universal team whom never left her side no matter how bad things got! 

And for that she was forever grateful.

 

She happily shared with the universe her love always

 because that was the bond they shared since day one.

Let go to Surrender

It was Sunday night, 

Or Early Monday morning, since it was  midnight exactly,

however people wanted to look at it, she imagined..

However, that wasn't the main event in her mind. 

Her mind was a fog, all day long... 

But towards the evening, it managed to get more dense

instead of clearing up like she wished it would. 

She wondered if maybe she was putting her power 

out there. 

And when she reminisced the night from earlier, 

she realized real quick that indeed she had. 

She wondered why though. 

What was making her give over her power all the time to outside

energies?

and that's when it hit her. 

It was because she wasn't getting anywhere in her own life.

She wasn't doing anything that was producing any fruit.

She was sinking.

Deeper and deeper into the great abyss of nothingness.

Why wasn't the energies working with her?

What was the hold up?

She couldn't figure it out. 

She was doing all that she loved. 

She was making videos on the stars and planets. 

She was offering all that she knew about birth charts

and the readings of it to the collective... 

Yet nothing was catching on. 

Nothing was being rewarded financially to her. 

She was getting deeper and deeper into debt.

She couldn't buy food, gas, clothes, let alone pay for any rent 

or utilities. 

She was really falling head first into a bottom less pit!

She tried so hard to get jobs. 

But no one seemed to respond. 

When she went to them, they all turned her away. 

What was happening?

Why was she stuck in this twilight zone?

What was the universe trying to tell her? 

And why couldn't she hear it?

She was at her wits end... 

And she knew... It was almost over.

All of it...

There was not much more that could fall. 

Disappear..

or even Explode...

It was time...

Time to just let go. 

Let go of it all. 

And so she did that night... 

She laid down after 3 glasses of Pinot Grigio..

and she softly said to herself...

God be with me as I lay me down to sleep..

I pray, thee my lord, my soul to keep...

and then she passed out...